Mother's Day is almost here, and for all you ladies, I know you're thinking the same thing.
1. I want coffee as soon as I wake up. Get up early, make it, have it ready, keep it hot and fresh and make it the way I like it. As soon as I open my eyes and sit up, hand it to me. You might have to stand there a while, silently breathing, keeping the coffee hot and fresh somehow.
2. The kind of breakfast you would make if it meant life or death.. I want the whole shebang. I'll stay in bed waiting patiently, and don't forget to refill my coffee.
3. I'm still confused about the whole kid thing on Mother's Day. Is it about me, or them? Do I take them somewhere fun, or are they to not be heard all day? Is there a camp they're supposed to go to?
4. The house cleaned, and not just half assed, I mean do it all. Don't leave anything for me the next day.
5. I want to watch whatever shows or movies I want. I'm going to play whatever music I want to as well, and you're gonna like it. I shall dance and you shall like it!
6. No, I'm not wiping anyone's butt today.
7. I hereby absolve myself of answering any questions today whatsoever.
8. For dinner? Reservations!
9. A nice long, hot, uninterrupted bath, while the kids get put magically to bed, and everything is quiet and peaceful.
10. Wreck it.