I'm a stocker

or am I really just an organized hoarder?

Hoarding or Stocking

          Hoarders are people who have a need to hang on to things because those things provide comfort. It is a form of OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) which is associated with bad memories, trust, emotional pain, grief, abandonment or loss, etc. Each of these can trigger hoarding, and before you realize what's happening, you've bought so much stuff that you now have a plethora of piñatas.

         Stuff doesn't leave you. Stuff doesn't make you cry. Stuff doesn't yell at you. Stuff doesn't call you names. Stuff doesn't die. Stuff makes you happy. Stuff fills the void. Stuff is fun. Stuff is a security blanket. Stuff is the wall that pain can't get through.

 

'Stuff' is the wall that traps the pain in.       

       Many hoarders do have a common trait in the desire for donating. They collect, with the intention of giving and helping others, but will still experience anxiety having to part with it. The money spent, on top of the room it takes up, may not be worth storing it at all and could eventually become a headache. Money can be spent on better types of supplies and prepping that doesn't involve saving trash or leaving valuables to rot from weather and exposure. Spend wisely! 

   

Become homeless and watch how fast you're not a hoarder any more.

 

 

Preppers and Homesteaders used to be called 'everybody' not too long ago.

https://homesteading.com/homestead-definition/
http://preppers.org/


You should go through everything you own at least once a year. Do I need it? Is it worth the price and space it requires? Is it valuable?
Have I used it in the last 6 months? Well, if I knew where it was I would have! Ha!

Stocking Up, aka Prepping

        I'm a 'stocker', or Prepper, which is a person who stocks up on supplies such as food, basic first aid, medicine, water and ways to purify water, personal hygiene, survival items and common essentials needed in case of emergency, or the next election. ;)
The type that real Preppers would say is an inspiring noob to mid level but definitely knowledgable and headed in the right direction.
I also need to step up the amount of food storage and learn much more survival information, including every type of edible plant indigenous to my home.

To a non-prepper, we all look paranoid. But that doesn't mean that something bad won't happen. It just means that we'll be more ready and prepared for an emergency.

         Let me ask you the following... Do you have copies of your home's deed or lease, car titles, birth certificates, shot records, marriage license, photos, emergency cash and any and all important paperwork and valuables in a waterproof, fireproof safe? How about a portable one in case you need to leave home? Do you keep emergency bags in each vehicle, and a very detailed one at home by the ready, with everything in it needed to survive in case all you had in life was that damn backpack?!



If you're a single mom, check out this site http://thesurvivalmom.com/

25 Must have foods to stock up on. And if you only have these 2, you're on a good start > BEANS AND RICE
http://www.offthegridnews.com/extreme-survival/25-must-have-foods-for-an-emergency-stockpile/

What's a Bug Out Bag, and what should I put in it?

https://bugoutbagacademy.com/free-bug-out-bag-list/

 

 

 



Don't forget to include all members of your family in this. Everyone in the household should know where the supplies are, what to do and where to go in case of emergency, where to meet up in case you are separated, who is responsible for what, and how much skills and supplies each person possesses. Make a plan!

 

http://www.redcross.org/get-help/prepare-for-emergencies/be-red-cross-ready/make-a-plan

Get your kids involved and teach them, on top of learning as a family.
http://www.survivopedia.com/teaching-children-survival/

Disclaimer: I am not responsible if you go online shopping and spend too much money and become addicted to Prepping.

The Phantom Bleeder

          I had a hysterectomy a few years back for Endometriosis but opted to keep my run-down ovaries, that is if they looked ok when the doc went in. They weren't too bad so that's all that's left of my womanhood down there, other than my boobs, I mean I'm still a girl ok, even if everything is a little run down or lower that it used to be.

          So this phantom bleeder that I've mentioned, it sucks. My daughter is on her period, her friends probably are, both of our dogs are in heat. Damn bleeding bitches. I feel everything still, just a little less than before.

     It only makes me want to choke a little less of the people that cross my path so that's good for them too. My lower back still hurts and I still feel cramping but that's just the Endo that got left behind that flares up with any surge of hormones. (Seriously, so much got left behind, they have to keep going in and cutting it out, and yet Endo grows on scar tissue, so it's this wonderful merry go round.) I still get emotional, irritable...all the same stuff that happens on a period, only I don't bleed. I also have no way of knowing when it's coming. There's no PMS. There's no warning. One day I'm Mary Poppins, the next....Medusa. I made cookies for the kids one time, and ate most of them the next day. It came on that fast. At this point, I'm looking forward to menopause, because I don't know how long I can handle menobroken-record.

Between that, the Fibro and arthritis I creak and hobble around. It looks like I'm trying to do the "Thriller" video dance down the hallway.


     So I'm "phantom bleeding" right now and I just wish I only had to do this every 6 months like the dogs. My daughter put a doggie diaper on her little one, it's her first heat. It was cute. You just have to take it off or change it every time you take them out to use the restroom.

A diaper you have to take off so you can pee. Fascinating. I had toddlers that did that without asking, bless their pissing little heart.



I got one for my dog and it would be fit for a small pony. But then I probably would forget to take it off so she could go outside and then freak out cuz she can't get the poop out and run around trying to figure out what to do, with crap hanging out as she's dragging her ass on the ground trying to get that contraption off of her. It was way more of a mess than anticipated. Then the dog got a hysterectomy. She's just mad she can't have chocolate. 

My phantom period has all the trademarks, moody, emotional, irritable, hungry, need chocolate, in pain, muscle cramps, crying during commercials. I had a hysterectomy 10 freaking years ago, and the lack of bleeding is literally the only difference. And now I get to be anemic. I wish there was some type of expiration date on these things that actually made sense. Like, one day you push out a kid, and your whole uterus just pops out too. "Oh you have a girl, and you graduated periods! Congratulations!!"

Being on the rag though, ugh....
I'm pretty sure that's how it got the name "the rag". A long time ago, the first bleeder could only think of one thing, stick a towel up that freaking faucet. I'm so glad I didn't have to clean out bloody wash clothes over and over. I don't remember seeing too many stories about that in Little House on the Prarie..."Oh no Laura, it's that time of month? Do you happen to have any spare rags in your outhouse?"

Sure Betty, they're next to the corn cobs. We got Pa's old hankies and Ma's dish towels, depending on your flow.

Moms are not allowed to go to the bathroom

Back a few years ago when I was a single mom to the terrible two twos, it got quite exciting to say the least. I did everything, and they did it all with me. Grocery store? You gotta bring both babies so now there's no room for any food. Can't let one walk cuz the other will go ballistic. Twins have to have the same thing, always. And always competing for me.

The only chance I have to do anything is that 30 minutes I had between getting home from work, bus and train, and the time I get the kids from daycare. The precious 30 minutes to get a lot done. You would be surprised how much you can do in that amount of time when you have to. I'm running people over in the stores, "Outa my way sister, I'm on a mission."


So I'm in this downstairs apartment with a tiny porch. Everyone on the 2nd and 3rd floor have a nice black railing on their balcony, how come I don't? No one on the 1st floor does. I mean as soon as I open the sliding glass door my (then 2 year old twin boys) go darting outside like a bull being ridden or a bird out its cage. Run free! Run fast as far as you can. That was my exercise everyday, chasing toddlers.
I'm jealous of the porches, so I run to the hardware store in that 30 minutes and get some supplies. (Same 30 minutes I used to go grocery shopping, pay bills, rent movies...etc. I was boss) I had measured everything out and was just getting some basic stuff.

The first day my friend helped me put up some 8 x 4 foot premade, spikey top (you know for 3' tall terrorists) fences and posts and cut them and it all looked good. Now the rules are that if you do that, you have to have it black, either painting it or by instead installing railings. Well after the whole weekend of being home and enjoying the whole patio thing, I decided that I needed to get it painted before too long as I'm sure there will be a complaint from 'that' neighbor who doesn't like anything you do.

On Sunday afternoon I take the wee little ones and my teenage daughter who helps when she can, back to the hardware store to buy paint. I like these carts better. They expect you to buy big things, so they're bigger and that means the kids can really sprawl out in it.

I buy black outdoor paint for the fence. Everything is going good. I drop my daughter off at a friends' house but she'll be home in about an hour. I take everything and everyone inside and by this time I am doing the pee pee dance. I set the closed pounded down can of paint on the kitchen counter and go to the bathroom........

Exactly 12.45 seconds later I come out of my room and for the first nanosecond my brain said "Oh wow,  look at the cute tiny footpr..." Mortified. O.M.G.
I didn't walk, I cringed down the hallway, and all I could hear was the 2 year old laughter of evil. Giggling and running around and making footprints of black paint all over my carpet.

This. (breath) Can't. (breath) Be. Happening (cant breath) OMG.

I pick him up and immediately want to get the toxic paint off my son even though what I WANT to do is pick him upside down and paint the fence with his long skater toddler hair. "Oh yeah, you want to play with the paint? How's that huh? You like that?" I quickly snap out of it and look at the evil twin grin and know; you are my child.

I clean the paint off him, and barely a little off the other twin who is always scared to do anything, brats. I'm freaking out. I just moved into this apartment, seriously? All I'm seeing is dollar signs. As I'm trying to clean, my daughter is there trying to help and call carpet cleaners.

I'm sorry, did I mention that it was 9pm on a Sunday night? Yay! Well after I ruined it by getting it wet trying to clean it up, which you should never get paint wet and try and clean it by yourself. The end result was I paid $200 for a brown stain on my carpet. It wasn't the last brown stain they made.

I just needed to pee, you little brats!

The Beautiful Places To Travel

Our Beautiful Country and all it's Wonders

        When it's sunny and warm out, I am reminded of all the wonderful things I've seen and places I've visited throughout my adventures across the country. The way the wind blows, and the sounds outside at night sometimes make me think of each pit stop in life. I yearn to travel more and teach my kids about the majestic wonders of the Earth. These are some of the more memorable places I've visited:


    San Francisco, CA:

Golden Gate Bridge, Golden Gate Park, Coit Tower, Crookedest Street in the World (Lombard), the Trolleys, Wax Museum, Ghirardelli Square, Candlestick Park (It will always be that to me), Ripley's Believe it our Not Museum, Pier 39, Fisherman's Wharf. The City is full of wonderful places to see. There's the prison Alcatraz on one island, and even a real life Treasure Island!

    Nashville, TN:

Graceland, Grand 'Ol Opry, I don't remember anything else other than I sat on my dad's shoulders to watch Jimmy Carter drive down the street in some kind of parade. Not far from there is Chattanooga where you can go to the top of See Rock City, the only place in the U.S. you can see 7 states at once.

South Bend, Indiana:

Notre Dame was an incredible sight! I was too young to appreciate much else, but I would can't wait to go back and visit and be able to share it with my children, like it was shared with me.


   Chicago, Illinois

Museum of Science and Industry (way cool!), Sears Tower (it takes the special elevator 60 seconds to go 110 stories) Gurnee Mills, Wrigley Field, some places they filmed "Blues Brothers" and "Ferris Buellers Day Off" :D. I almost got ran over by a presidential brigade. Out of nowhere here comes more Cops and Limos I've ever seen coming down Upper Wacker. Almost knocked me into Lower Wacker.

  Reno, and Las Vegas Nevada:

Casinos! Reno has some pretty fun places like Circus Circus! but there's much more to see in Las Vegas, Pirate Ships, The Eiffel Tower, a Pyramid, The Sphinx, and a mesmerizing display of water ballet await you, along with the behemoth engineering of Hoover Dam, Carson City, Lake Tahoe, Virginia City in it's Wild West flashback. It's a desert, so for me there's not much else to see unless you're really into sand :D

Atlanta, Georgia

Underground Atlanta, Kennesaw Mountain (canons that have never moved since the Civil War), Stone Mountain (A.MA.ZING), a pickup truck with a gun rack and a Confederate Flag (I saw a LOT), where they filmed Deliverance, any coffee cup you want starting with Mary xxxx (i.e. Mary Jane, Mary Jo, Mary Sue, Mary Ann, Mary Beth, Mary Ellen....) Kudzu is a vine type plant that grows very rapidly and can completely engulf a house and entire forest!

Phoenix, Arizona

The Grand Canyon, other than that there ain't much to see! Haha It's too flippin HOT! They have a pretty incredible Botanical Gardens that are filled with more cactus than you ever thought existed. Butterflies are very popular there. North of the city is Sedona and near that is Montezuma's Castle. Do you think it's a real castle?


  Northern and Southern Oregon

Mt. Hood (which you can ski on 11 months a year), Klamath Falls, The Oregon Caves, Columbia River, lots of good rafting, The Goonies House, more Redwood trees. Hood River is the wind surfing capital of the world I hear, and these dare-devils are flying pretty high up! Grants Pass, and the trendy college towns are fun for all. Don't forget to check out the Out 'N About Tree Houses near the caves!
http://treehouses.com/joomla/

Seattle, Washington:

Space Needle, The Upper Cascades, Fish Markets on the Puget Sound, The Ice Caves in the SW part of the state (You are in shorts, sweating. The people 15 feet below you, looking at you, are in snow gear, freezing. Super cool), an exact replica of Stone Henge, (A.MA.ZING) BTW, it sure does seem like a calendar to me. It's very cool sitting there atop Sam Hill.

Washington D.C.

The Smithsonian Institute(s), and boy are there a lot of them, The White House, The Mall, as it's called, with the Lincoln Memorial and the Reflection Pool along with the Washington Monument, are just incredible. It's pretty humid there in August, heads up!


Many more random places I've visited or are on my Bucket List...

Zion National Park, Utah
Yellowstone, Wyoming
Estes Park, Colorado
Roswell, New Mexico
Texas and the Gulf of Mexico


And all the rest of California. I love this state and have been up and down the West Coast in awe of all it's beauty!

Jack London Park, Napa vineyards, Sears Point Raceway, The Nut Tree, The Jelly Belly Factory, Monterey Bay Aquarium, Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk, I've been to at least a half dozen Six Flaggs and two or more are in CA, Isleton Crawdad Festival, Yosemite, Sea Port Village, Padre Stadium, Bodega Bay, La Jolla, Disney Land, Sea World, San Diego Zoo, Balboa Park, Wild Animal Park, Sequoia Trees (HUGE)..etc lol


I've traveled by car, truck, RV, bus, train, and plane. My favorite was the train. I've spent a total of 12 days on many different Amtrak trains all over the country. Some are even narrated with the local history of the surroundings, and even more places no one else sees.


This post could go on forever, but I'll try and stop it here. This is beautiful land we got here. There is so much to see and do.

Stop working so much. Live simpler.

 

Have experiences and memories, not 'things', because things don't last. The memories may fade along with the pictures over time, but both can be preserved and documented and cherished much longer than that new piece of furniture you bought.

 

Valentine's Day

So this is the day where we give flowers and chocolates. I'm over it. I'm glad my BF is glad that I'm over it. Seven years ago today I was sitting in a restaurant 6 months pregnant with twins and the monster got mad at me for some reason and threw his plate of food down, splattering it everywhere. Then he yelled at me, got up and walked out. I was sooooo embarrassed. Wtf could I have said or done to deserve that? Nothing, I did nothing to deserve it, that's what!! I didn't know what to do. I just sat there and took a few bites, brushed the food off, LEFT THE MONEY, and walked out, or should I say waddled.

Everyone was looking. the monster is 6'7" 300 lbs. Everyone always agrees with him, who wouldn't want to. I could see their eyes "she must have done something to deserve it, why would you set him off, its valentines day, what a bitch, she got what she had coming. I read their thoughts straight out of their pupils. the window to your mind. God you people are so easy to read. Yes that's it, put your head down in shame because you don't want to get involved, just stay out of it, right? Let me tell you, I sure as shit don't need you in my village.

While I was cleaning this off my belly, I got dirty looks for ruining everyone's dinner by making him mad. It was all my fault. Yep, I made him do it.


So when my BF suggested Chinese buffet for dinner tonight, I had serious PTSD flashbacks of pulling chow mien off my stomach and flicking rice off my arms. I have learned not to say anything. I want to, but its not his job to BFF my girl issues. Besides, one time he said "so, I have to pay for your exes mistakes?" wake up call. No, you shouldn't have to. I could come up with a whole damn long list of things that cause flashbacks. I mean anything and everything could possibly remind me of some horrible event. But its not happening now! Push it aside. Don't punish the loved ones that are here now. It's not their fault that your mental. Its the monsters fault. Besides, I'm trying to make new happy memories, that way many valentines down the road I will look back and see these ones. Not to mention that I'm not that much into it since it started as a celebration of a roman catholic priest being executed. Just like Christmas, a holiday that is celebrated completely opposite of what it means, which is basically another holiday I don't care about either. BF said "we can just do our own valentine whenever we want, hey tomorrow everything is half off" my kind of man.

We have been together about 2 1/2 years. he totally understands me. On Facebook and other sites you can list if and what kind of relationship you are in. There is one that says "its complicated" BF says "there should be one that's says "She's complicated'" Lmao..love u baby..